11 July 2013

A Life of Wabi

I had this whole post written in my head last night as I tried to fall asleep.
 It was brilliant.
 Then I woke up and all my precisely picked wording was gone.
 They're floating in the great abyss, along with many of my marbles, I suppose. So, I will start again, because that is what one does, especially when one has children who have a tendency to help facilitate the practice of re-doing what was once done.
I've just finished reading The Elegance of the Hedgehog and have latched onto the idea wabi, which means "an understated form of beauty, a quality of refinement masked by rustic simplicity."
It seems that once a week I tend to re-evaluate some aspect of my life.  Not so much conscientiously, but nudged by a thought of my own or of someone else.  Usually it happens on Sunday when a discourse or verse moves me to make changes.  Sometimes it happens mid-week, after a catalyst of a mundane nature helps me realize, this isn't working.
This week it was about minutia.  Which is a very touchy subject indeed, for me.  I usually thrive on the small details of life.  Like rainbowtizing the books.  Does it truly matter in the scheme of this life?
 Probably not.  But, does it matter to me?  This one does.  I believe it adds to the fullness of my life.  My house is my workspace, my place of creativity, my office.  If it doesn't inspire and bring joy, then it needs to change.
Particularly when I sew, I like the details.  The little extras that are frequently not part of the initial plan, but come to me as I'm working.  The details that make my heart race, just a little, because I find them exciting and flavorful.

But, then.  Aren't there always the but, thens in my posts?
 When we moved to Magnolia Manor we made the conscientious decision to get rid of the superfluous. Once we unpacked, we got rid of more.  Now that we have the token 3 boxes left in our bedroom, like a blister that just won't go away, we have done more streamlining, and I feel there is even more to be done, and that it's never really complete, just like the laundry and the feeding of hungry mouths.
 But it's not just the stuff I reference, although a clutter-free space can do more for inspiring the  creative mind than most sources, it's what we choose to do with our time.
 My kids like a game called Temple Run 2.  I resisted even trying it because, well, I know me.  But after weeks of reporting their scores and successes, I gave it a shot.
 One of my less useful skills is that of a video-gamer.  Growing up with a garage full of coin operated video games, I am good at the nimble finger movements required for high scoring.  A most useless "skill" in the real world.
But, I found myself spending too much time, running toward a goal that didn't really exist.  Waiting for the pasta water to boil, I'd take it out and play.  Waiting for the iron to warm up, I'd take it out and play.  So, when the thought flashed in my mind, I took out my phone and deleted it entirely.  Remove the temptation. As insignificant as this example is, it helped open my eyes to other changes I could make.
Pearl was sitting next to me, in church, when I erased the game.  I was glad she saw me.  She looked at me like What have you done?!  I told her I decided there was a plethora of other things I'd rather be doing with my time.
 Because there are.  Like these 6 faces. (Plus Ryan, of course.)  
 Even if it's getting down on the floor to laugh more.
 One of my favorite things is how Drummer does his squeaky toy laugh, although it's more like a squeaky toy in need of repair, with a bit of a wheezing sound, when he's particularly amused, like when he dumps cold water on my feet in the shower and I squeal with shock.
Or spending an extra few minutes tucking in and snuggling with each child, learning what their thoughts are from the day, because sometimes there is so much demand for attention during the day from everyone that someone is bound to miss out.
 Or even just spending a few minutes alone on the porch swing with my own thoughts.  And maybe the mail ;).
 I want to delete the superfluous minutia that is sucking my time, the only time I have.
 I know there will be always be metaphorical apps that I struggle to delete from my life,
 but I think as long as there a frequent re-evaluations, perpetual refinement, and intentional decisions about what I do with my time,
 I will find more fulfillment and contentment.
 I think I will achieve wabi
 that understated form of beauty, a quality of refinement masked by rustic simplicity."




44 comments:

  1. I love this post. I am constantly at battle with myself. Acquiring vs purging, creating vs just being, being a part of the wider world/friends vs being fully a part of our own little family unit.
    I do believe that peace can be found in less. It's just so good to enjoy life and get out from life all it has to offer... but now I'm rambling. Beautiful pictures!

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  2. I read that book, too! And also was smitten with the concept of wabi. But, I was so sad at the end of that book!! You may not feel like you achieve wabi but your pictures and your words certainly do. And, that spreads seeds of it out into the world for people like me to catch. Thanks for that.

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  3. Wow! What a beautiful, thought provoking post. Thank you, Katy. I needed that.

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  4. Thank you for this post...I so needed to read this today.

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  5. I have been struggling so much with this lately, desperate to find things I can delete. Things that are taking my time and space. Your beautiful post has inspired me to start small and keep working. To see it as a process instead of something I can fix in a day or a week. Wishing you so much luck in your search for wabi.

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  6. Thank you. You put into words what I've been feeling lately.

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  7. Running towards a goal that doesn't really exist. Ouch. Thank you!

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  8. Thanks so much for sharing that today! I also have the mindset of my home being my workplace, and it has to be inspiring--and I'm working on the clutter constantly. I'm also learning that having spice bottles scattered through my home, and measuring cups, and tape measures, oh and toys scattered through our home is also inspiring--to my one year old. :) I love what you shared about getting rid of the game. I have stopped looking at blogs so much. I look a bit in the morning, and then go about my day. Because like you said, there's a plethora of other things I could be spending my time with! :)

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  9. deep AND profound.
    love to read your thoughts.
    I learn from you.

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  10. I know that the technology suck is a modern issue, and one I battle against too. But I occasionally wonder what the distractions were in the past? I know people are as they have always been. I spent the month of June clearing out the stored stuff we've accumulated after 8 yrs in one home and gaining 3 more of our 6 children. Unfortunately, the sorting and purging caused dirt, dust, and mess. Now, to gain some momentum back to CLEAN - truly clean. ugh, a mother's work is never done.

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  11. So funny u posted this today! I just deleted candy crush and my kids are so confused... I told we have better things to do than worry about when our next life will become available! It was my New Years resolution to streamline, we also moved and purged and I deleted Pinterest and Facebook from my phone and iPad :) baby steps

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  12. Well, this might not be what you originally had written in your mind, but it's wonderful!!! I totally agree!!! We just moved into a house that is four hundred square feet smaller than our last house, so we are downsizing, clearing away the clutter, out of sheer necessity. But ever since the year started, I've been downsizing, feeling the need to focus on the few truly beautiful than a house full of mediocre. Same with time. This is so ineloquent compared to your words, but anyway... thank you!

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  13. Amen to Wabi. I am on the cusp of a gargantuan purge. Thank you for the inspiration.

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  14. love this post. I've been on a bit of a quest to simplify, myself. BTW, that little Drummer is delicious. Beautiful family.

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  15. Another clever post from Ms Dill. I LOVED reading The Elegance of the Hedgehog - loved it. I call it the best book with the worst title when I recommend it to people ;-) And I deleted my Scrabble app from my phone the other day - cold turkey!

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  16. you are always so inspiring! this is such a great post, with beautiful photos, as usual! Thanks for sharing and hooray for Wabi! Off to check out that book now! :)

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  17. I love this so much! I am struggling with this daily - the limited free time I have and what I choose to do with it. Thanks for the bit of inspiration.

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  18. GAH I love your thoughtful posts, Katy. I have similar thoughts on wanting to purge STUFF and feeling so good when I do, and we have the "easily addicted to video games" thing in common, too. ;) I can't even start! Kind of the same with books, actually - if I start a book, I don't put it down until I'm done, staying up until 3am..

    Anyway. You're inspiring. I love that you care about details even though it seems with 6 kids you wouldn't have any time to bother. And it shows you remain connected to yourself and your passions, too, which is a cool thing.

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  19. I'm going to be thinking about this one for a long time, the metaphorical apps in our lives. Thank you for sharing. I felt very uplifted after I read your thoughts.

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  20. You are totally inspiring. THANK YOU for that!
    Daiga from Latvia

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  21. You did a great job of rewriting your post. Lovely words and photographs. I dont often go back to look at photos in a blog post but I scrolled through your post today several times, and of them all, the one of Drummer and the rabbit took my breath away.
    Reading about your journey to awareness is very inspiring.
    Thank you.

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  22. Love this and the comments! thank you!

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  23. Such inspiring words and amazing pictures! First time on your blog and I want to stay and be your friend. Your thoughts correlate with a book I'm reading called 7 by Jen Hatmaker. Taking the challenge to live with less--which is really to live with more.

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    1. Love good book recommendations--will get it from the library.

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    2. because adding another book to my library would just be adding more "stuff", right? ;)

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  24. Tears. I have tears. Well said and depicted my friend. :)

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  25. somebody give this woman a book deal already!!!

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    1. Haha, you're too nice, Delia dear. (do I always call you that, because I love it.)

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  26. i can so relate to this post! i deleted my Instagram account *today and my FB account a couple of months ago. i wasn't on either much, but when i was, i always felt like i wanted my time back! a few months back i added two bible apps to my phone, the NLT and the ESV study bible with commentary. i'm reading the bible in a year for a second year in a row. it has been so life-giving. my husband works a lot and we have four kids, including a high need toddler. we recently started homeschooling. my time is so limited and i want to use it well.

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    1. Rachel-I created a FB account but never used it and so glad it never became an issue. Homeschooling is definitely a worthy way to use your time ;)

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  27. I too have experienced the same feelings/ reevaluations, and gotten rid time suckers. Sometimes I have to really think on it before I get rid of something. Is it therapeutic enough that I need to actually make more time for it? Or is it just a useless waste of my time that should be better spent? Sometimes, if I do feel it is something that is an outlet for me, I tell myself that I have to do ______ chore, before I can spend time doing those other things. It helps me get my least favorite jobs done quicker!

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  28. amazing post. period. and so relevant to me personally

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  29. Great post Katie! We just had our fourth, a little girl named Ava. I am feeling a little overwhelmed(she is only a week old)...so I know it's normal, but you inspire me. I guess if you can do 6 and give them the attention they deserve then I guess I can too:) but maybe I need to erase a few things from my life as well. Looks like your doing great and I can't wait to see more of your cute house!!

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    1. Marianne! Congratulations!!! Hooray for another singleton, right? Hope you guys are doing well and enjoying your adventures west.

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  30. Thank goodness! I thought this post was leading to an Instagram delete... and that'd be an awful shame as your photos are simply stunning! Seriously they are amazing, I so look forward to seeing them in my feed...
    Yep, delete the game but don't delete your IG... it's good to be selective when reducing :-)

    Less is more,
    more is less,
    your post is ace,
    and your pics the best!

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    1. There are a lot of things I'd delete before instagram, but even that has to be in moderation, right? :)

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  31. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I love reading you posts. Every time I do, I come away with the desire to change, to be better and to try harder in life. Thank you so much!!
    p.s. your pictures are BEAUTIFUL too! You have a good eye!

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  32. I will have to say that I stumbled on to your blog and this is the second msg I am posting in less then an hour. I just wanted you to know that you are a real blessing and a true inspiration for me. We have been in our home which was also a down size as 2 of my children moved out. I am embaressed to say that we still have boxes not unpacked and our car port could be on the show hoarders. My goal is to purge a lot. The clutter even though sometimes makes your home feel more homey gets a bit overwhelming and leads to depression. This post has truly inspired and motivated me to just throw out and simplify. I need to prioritize my time and what I choose to fill it with. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and your life with the world. I am looking forward to reading your posts and gaining inspiration on how to put what's really important first and foremost in my daily tasks of life. God bless you and your family!

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    1. Thank you, Lisa. It definitely can add to the ominous feelings of depression. The physical nature of clutter can cloud the mental clarity we seek.

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  33. This was the best post yet for me! I don't have 6 adorable little kids at home anymore but I have all the remnants for 3 that have been out of the house for 7 years (the youngest) and then the youngest moved back in after a divorce and illness that rocked her world. My sewing/knitting room became hers again, along with a dog, a cat and a turtle. My sewing table is now a turtle tank stand. I've collected enough yarn, knitting bags, needles, crochet hooks, fabric, thread, patterns that when the room was no longer mine my house became a bin. Like the attic when they all moved out and left the "stuff" that they'd want some day, really Mom, and never came back to get. So now my dilemma is..........what on earth do I do with it all? It keeps me awake nights, I hate waking up in the morning and seeing it. Sell it? Throw it out (couldn't, that's a big investment) give it away? I'm so ready to do what you did, just need to find out which direction it all needs to go in. Thanks for that Katie, you've got my mind spinning. :o)

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  34. Katy, I love this post. I also love the pictures, but mostly the post. I feel the same way. I have so many things I'd rather do than watch TV. I probably watch 1-2 hours in a week, and sometimes not even that much. It just doesn't do anything for me anymore. And the best thing is, I don't miss it. If it weren't for my husband and sports, we wouldn't have a TV.

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  35. you are such an artist and poet.
    and a wonderful mom.
    and trying to do your best like everyone else (hopefully) is. And I love these kind of posts that you do!...because you do it so well and I feel like you're reading inside of my brain.
    and sooooo many times I've written a blog post in my head, while in the shower, and it's the best thing ever, and then it's gone when I sit down at the computer to type.
    So i feel ya.
    except that you totally pull it back out afterall.
    haha.
    I love you Katy Dill.
    In a bloggy, friend, love kind of way that doesn't sound creepy :)

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    1. You made my day, Dana. One day we will meet person, to person.

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